In Your Eyes -11- A Private Matter - lemon

You looked over your living room, it was a bit of a mess. You had to straighten up at least a little bit. After picking up a few things you took up the gifts you had received and headed to your room. You slid the book in between your other cook books and then set the picture with the other two.

You sat down and smiled, "Hey mom ... see my new ... team? I was really unsure when I first came here, but they've all been great. I know you'd like them. I really missed you today," you paused, "and I'm sorry. I should've been there to protect you, I hope you can forgive me."

You let out a deep sigh as you fell back on the bed. You climbed under the sheets taking time to only squirm out of your pants. You had let yourself get pretty buzzed and your plan was to sleep in a little while tomorrow, no alarm clock for once.

Sure enough you got a couple extra hours of sleep and it felt great. You made your way to the bathroom and took a hot shower. After about an hour you stepped out, steam pouring out of the small room.

"Ah, that was great," you sighed.

You loved it when you could take long showers. You tossed the towel aside and changed into a pair of loose black pants and a grey top. You were going to be cleaning for a while and decided it was a good outfit for it.

You groaned as you walked into the front of your apartment, you really had forgotten all the trash that had accumulated.

"Well, gotta start somewhere," you said as you began picking up dishes. You had gotten the stack of plates in the sink when there was a knock on your door. You glanced up at the clock, it was already past noon.

You greeted Kakashi with a warm smile, "Hey."

"You're not hung over this morning?" he asked in disbelief.

"No, should I be?"

"I guess not," he chuckled, "I already got chewed out by Kurenai. She said to never let her drink that much again."

He then turned his attention to all the clutter, "Wow, well I guess we did get a little carried away."

"A little? Kurenai went crazy. She skipped the wild phase didn't she?"

"Most likely. So, lets get to it shall we?"

It took a good solid hour or two but your apartment was back to a spotless clean. Kakashi was relaxing on the couch, reading of course, while you finished drying the dishes off.

"Hey, would you like some tea?" you called out as you set a plate down and picked up another.

"Sure, thank you."

You put a pot of tea on and fixed up a quick lunch of noodles, shrimp, and vegetables. You were hungry and figured he might be too. You poured two cups of tea and then brought the food over to the table.

"Are you hungry?"

"Yeah, you must be psychic or something," he replied, nose still deep in the book.

"Well, get your butt over here then."

He brought his book down and looked towards you, a bit surprised. You just grinned at him and sat down at the table. He joined you and you gave him a small smile as you took a bite. Kakashi's eye lingered on you for a moment before he started to eat. He finished in record time and you couldn't help but still be amused by the way he ate. He brought back out his book and sat back in his chair, drinking his tea and continuing to read. Soon, you were finished and you poked him to get his attention. He followed you back over to the couch. You curled up and sipped your drink.

"Kakashi, thank you again for everything. It really meant a lot to me."

"You're welcome."

You let your index finger run over the necklace he had given you, "And this, I don't think you let me thank you for it."

"It's nothin really. I just saw it one day and thought how good you would look wearing it," he paused and looked you over for a moment, "I was right."

You sucked in on your bottom lip. You set your cup down and stood up, grabbing his hand, "Come with me, I want to show you something."

He stared up at you and tilted his head in thought before standing up. You led him to your room and shut the door behind you.

"So, what is it?"

"Look at the second shelf with the pictures," you were nervous but decided to go for it anyway.

"So, what were you wanting me to see?" his question became a mumble as he turned around, but then again you were standing there topless. You walked over to him and grabbed onto his jacket, the blush creeping over your face.

"Um ... Kanade?"

Your eyes traveled up to meet his, "You're not going to turn me down are you? I said I was ready, remember?"

"Oh I remember alright."

Suddenly embarrassment took over you and and you turned away covering yourself with your arms. You picked your shirt up off of the ground, "I'm sorry."
"For what? You didn't do anything."

"I just threw myself at you! Ugh, I'm so stupid, what was I thinking?" you sat on the bed and hung your head.

The bed sunk in to your left and Kakashi wrapped an arm around you, "Hey," he slid two fingers under your chin and lifted your face so he could see you, "It's okay."

"But ..."

"It's okay."

"But I .."

"It's okay Kanade."

You opened your mouth to say something but he cut you off, "Just shut up," he leaned in as he brought down his mask, kissing your lips gently.

You let your shirt fall back to the floor and wrapped your arms around him. His tongue slid between your parted lips and you welcomed it with your own. You unzipped his jacket and pulled it off, doing your best to not break the kiss. But he pulled away as he sat back and peeled his shirt off. You were almost in awe at how toned he was, but you were expecting it. You traced a scar that ran across the left side of his chest. He grabbed onto your hand and pulled you against him. he kissed you again, slowly lowering your bodies to the mattress. His lips traveled down your neck, the center of your chest and your stomach.


This time, you didn't tense up when he unbuttoned your pants. The sound of the zipper being lowered was faint, but enough to give you chills in anticipation. He pulled the pants from your waist and let them fall to the floor. Kakashi ran his hands down your thighs with a light squeeze. His breath on the outside of your right thigh tickled your skin and you smiled as he kissed you there. He continued trailing kisses down your leg and then peered up at you before going to your left kissing at your ankle. He made his way back up but this time on the inside of your leg. He brought himself towards your lips again. He took a break to remove his hitai-ate, leaving his eye closed.

You wrapped your arms around him, letting them rest on his shoulders.

He nibbled at your ear, "Besides my books and my walks, this is one of the few things I take my time with."

Your eyes widened and a lovely shade of pink filled your cheeks. He gently sucked on your neck as one of his hands tended to your breast. This was a completely different form of excitement, no one had ever touched you this way. He made a return trip down to your stomach and your waist, his lips, tongue and fingers teasing you along the elastic band of your panties. He tugged down on them and you lifted your hips so he could remove them.

This time he kissed you roughly, eagerly letting his tongue dance with yours. His right hand rubbed the inside of your thigh and you inhaled deeply as he ran his thumb over your clit. he tried breaking the kiss but you kept holding him close, so he decided not to fight it. Your body felt hot, you thought you must be blushing all over.

But you were jolted from your thoughts as you felt his hand between your legs again and one of his fingers slowly dip inside you. You couldn't help but gasp, but he quickly seduced you back into relaxation, kissing you tenderly on your neck. He added another finger, letting them slowly rock in and out. You bit down on your lip and grabbed at the back of his head. This felt amazing and he was being so gentle with you. He brought his wet fingers out and rubbed one around your clit. A small squeak escaped your mouth and then you sighed as pleasure swept over you.

He tore himself away from you so he could remove his pants. He pushed your legs up, bending them at the knee and he settled between them, positioning himself to enter.

He looked you in the eye and studied your face carefully, "Kanade, I need you to do something for me."

"What is it?"

"This is going to be painful at first, but besides that, I don't want to hurt you. Will you ... let me know if I do?"

"Okay," you replied softly with a nod.

He lowered himself to be close to you as he slowly began to push inside. It did hurt, you tightly shut your eyes and clenched at the blankets. You grunted as he pushed in a little more. You clenched your jaw to hold in a cry. Once he was fully inside, he rested for a moment to let you get adjusted to him.

He looked down at you, your face in a small twist of pain, "Kanade?"

You opened your eyes, a tear escaped and slid out from the bottom corner of your eye. He wiped it away with his thumb, "If it's too painful we can stop."

"No, I'm okay," you lifted your head and he met you for a kiss.

He slowly and steadily began to rock his hips. Every push inside hurt, you closed your eyes again and willed the pain away, letting out small groans and cries until it finally subsided.

He repositioned you, wrapping your legs around his waist. You moaned with the first thrust.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah."

He tried a little harder and gauged your reaction. You gasped and clung onto him tightly.

"Did I hurt you?" he seemed worried.

"No, it's fine, keep going."

Steady breathing turned to panting and cries of pleasure erupted from both of you, well mostly from you. Your body was slick with sweat, yours and his. Instinct controlled your movements, your vocal outbursts. You grabbed at his thick hair at the back of his head and moaned as he thrust into you. A strange, warm, almost tingling sensation began to build. As he continued to drive himself deep inside, the feeling began to intensify causing your body to lightly tremble. But it was enough for Kakashi to notice.

He sped up his pace which made the feeling grow and grow and your trembling became shaking. You clung onto him desperately, your nails slightly digging into his back. your toes curled and uncurled, it all felt like it was too much. Just when you thought you couldn't take anymore, you climaxed, your back arching as a wave of euphoria washed over you. Kakashi let out a small cry with a final thrust and let himself rest on top of you.

Your breaths came out in hot puffs and you could feel his heart pounding mercilessly. You inhaled sharply as he withdrew and then moved to your side, laying back.


He pulled you towards him, letting you lie on his chest.

"Are you okay?"

You were still trying to catch your breath but you replied anyway, "I'm ... wonderful."

"I didn't hurt you?"

"No."

"Good."

He lightly rubbed your back and suddenly you understood why in the movies and stories the couple usually fell asleep after making love. Your eyes felt heavy as you kissed his chest.

You made yourself push away from him, "You're going to make me fall asleep."

His eyes were closed but he replied with a small grin, "A nap never hurt anyone."

Apparently he was feeling it too. You smiled and cuddled up with him and as soon as you were comfortable you fell asleep.


-Kakashi POV-

I woke up about half an hour later, Kanade was still against me sleeping. For the first time in a long time, I felt torn. All of this was supposed to help Kanade, but I knew it was just going to hurt her. I was advised not to get close to her, but I couldn't help it. She just seemed right to me. I'm not the type to go looking for a woman so maybe it was some sort of destiny or fate that we came to know each other.

She began to stir but to my surprise she stayed asleep. A bit of hair fell into her face and I gently pushed it aside. She looked so peaceful and happy and I felt horrible. She had trusted me with so much and she chose to give me something she saved for 18 years. I can't do this to her, I won't. I was going to tell the Hokage I changed my mind. We can find another method that would be just as effective.

I turned to look at her, being careful not to wake her. I caressed her face, "I won't let them do it."

I rested back and stared at the ceiling. It was strange, everyone I've ever cared about is dead and now to have her here with me like this ... Is it possible that I was feeling more for her?

"Kakashi?"

I turned my attention to her, she was looking up at me with a sleepy smile, "Did I wake you?"

"No," her reply came lightly.

"Kanade, there's something I have to go do."

"Oh," she sat up covering herself with the sheets, "okay then."

"Listen, it'll only take a little while. I'll come back as soon as I'm done, I can take you to dinner."

She gave me a half smile, "Okay."

I gave her a kiss on the forehead before getting out of bed to gather my clothes. I could feel her eyes on me as I dressed. I leaned down and kissed those soft lips of hers, "I'll be back soon I promise."

She nodded and I put my mask in place before leaving.



-*-


This was the right decision. I couldn't let this happen, not just because I was worried she'd hate me afterwards, but it just didn't feel right. I had to wait to see the Hokage so I just went over what I was going to say. Soon enough, I was in his office.

"Kakashi, this is a surprise."

"I need to speak with you."

"About Kanade yes?" he asked packing his pipe, he didn't even look at me.

"Yes."

"What is it?"

I took a breath, "I've been thinking and I have changed my mind. This method of testing her, I don't think it's wise. It's too cruel and she doesn't need it, we can find another way. We can't do this to her, I don't want to do it anymore."

He was quiet for a moment, smoking on his pipe. But then he looked at me, setting his smoke down, "I'm afraid that's not possible."